Wiltshire v Sussex at Chippenham

4th Chippenham

1.  After an inspirational, emotional and motivational speech the previous evening, Captain Brian led us off in what proved to be a very close encounter. Sadly, Brian’s playing partner, VC Peter Ward, was clearly not paying as much attention to Brian’s speech as he should have been – the general view is that he was thinking about putting his entry form in for next years “The Great British Bake Off “ instead of concentrating on the match. Lost 1 down


2.  Richard “Matelot” Jays, sporting his new deck shoes recently acquired from the Littlehampton Yacht Club, and Mike “ another large scotch please” Davis, came up against the bionic former Captain of Chippenham “Pat the Hat “ who had the uncanny knack of sinking puts from 20/30 feet on a regular basis.  Mike on the otherhand never recovered from his waspish experience on the 2nd – sting in the tail led to a 4 and 3 loss.


3.  The Hon Sec and “ Harry” Potter quote “ Ham and Egged it well “ – after a full English breakfast, 4 rounds of toast, 3 coffees and 2 Danish pastries – all Potter was capable of writing about was food!  Still the 2 big lads from Sussex did the business winning 3 and 1. Mark was in sparkling form all tour – both on and off the course.  Hope everyone can recall the snail story!!


4.  The Haywards Heath duo of Andy Plowright and me once again drew the short straw – up against the combined forces of the British Army and Navy!  They certainly knew how to use their shots – in Harry’s case all 12 of them (including stoke index 11 on the 18th short par 5 – jammy bugger).  We lost on the 18th with bandit Bobby from Wiltshire putting “ miraculously “ on the back nine – his own description of his performance not mine!!  No sour grapes here then!


5.  New tourist Nigel (I’ve always wanted to be a barman) Wates and IPC Jags started off with some outstanding golf – well Nigel did anyway! 4 up after 9 – gross better ball 1 over par.  In fairness Nigel did say Jags’ putting was awesome – I may have misheard it as awful – but I will give him the benefit of the doubt on this occasion.  However, with fatigue kicking in, and Jags chatting up women on the course, the concentration lapsed and their opponents recovered with some good golf.  Squeaky bum time as it got to the 18th which I am delighted to report we won!  Well done boys!


6.  Lowest handicapper and highest handicapper in the Sussex team shrewdly drawn to play together by our leader Captain Brian! Big Joe Angella (5) and the “Gerken” Milburn (20) did the trick winning 2 and 1.  Their opponents described our boys company as “adequate” – bit harsh but I can understand where they’re coming from!  The fun started after the game in the changing room when Jags tried to get into Joe’s trousers (they were a bit tight for him) and Norman managed to loose the kitty – or thought he had!  All resolved happily at the end of the day with a beer or two!  Norman loves writing match input – quote – “ The rain held and the sun shone” – brilliant education!


7.  Now a “dog license “ in these inter county matches is very rare – so well done to Derek May and Jerry Hibbs for producing a 7 and 6 win.  Both brought their A game on this occasion which in Derek’s case is amazing really as he spent most of his pre match preparation travelling up and down the A350 (left his jacket and tie in the pub).  On his eventual arrival he was greeted with a few cold chips and the odd crust – undaunted he rose to the challenge and came up trumps.  Gin and cider seems like an odd combination – but clearly works for Derek!


8.  The anchor team of Neil Smith and leftie Keith Talbot told me they have become known as the dynamic Sussex duo – Neil  dynamic?   You must be joking! I think they got a birdie between them and got a little carried away with their success.  It was a tight match with our boys “ mugging” their opponents to win on the last - Neil gave one of the Wiltshire boys the wrong yardage on the final hole and he overshot the green by some margin – excellent!!   That’s the way to get a good half!


Result         Sussex 4½     Wiltshire 3½

Phil Williamson

IMG 1532


 David Ruffett (Wiltshire Captains) hands over the ‘Ball Marker’ Trophy to Brian Street

     © Sussex Golf Captains 2019